The Children's Hour
by Padfootsgirl
Summary: Slash: Unconrollable events bring togther two enemies who now must face something they've never known:love -- Bad summarry, sorry. I'm back!! Yeah!!
1. No End, No Beginning

No End, No Beginning **Author's Note:** Okay, this is a new series, obviously. This is my first time writing slash, so I will do my best not to screw it up to badly, but if I do, I'm sure you'll all tell me. Well, please review, I would really love you for it! 

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**The Children's Hour**

_I have you fast in my fortress,_   
_And will not let you depart,_   
_But put you down into the dungeon_   
_In the round-tower of my heart.___

_And there will I keep you forever,_   
_Yes, forever and a day,_   
_Till the walls shall crumble to ruin,_   
_And moulder in dust away!_**__**

**_Chapter I: No End, No Beginning_**   
_There is no end. There is no beginning. There is only the infinite_   
_ passion of life._   
_ --Federico Fellini_

**Harry's Point of View**   
  
I thought he would hate me. I had been so sure that he would reject me. This was the third time in my life that I felt the pain of knowing someone I loved would hate me. It was also the third time I was wrong.   
Looking back, I'm not sure when it began. Ron would tell me that it began on Halloween our fifth year. Hermoine tried to tell me that it never began, that it had always been there, just as it would never end and always remain. Of the two, she's the closest, but both are still wrong.   
Now that enough years have passed for me to look back upon it, the two of us have come to decide it all really began the summer after fourth year. That's when it all really began. We had all grown up so much that last year that we could no longer see things as we once had, as through the eyes of child. We weren't adults yet, but all of us knew that the time would come, and it wasn't far off, and we would have to mature into the adult we were to become. We would have to choose our sides, as the lines were being drawn very carefully. We had little time left to be young and carefree, if we ever were such things. So all of us, Fred, George, Dean, Seamus, Ginny, Ron, all of us tried our best to be children just awhile longer. We tried our best to hold on to the one thread of innocence we all still possessed.   
But it came to end. All too soon it came to an end. And none of us were ready for it when it did. 

**To Be Continued**   
  
Yes I realize this one is short, but it's pretty much just a teaser. The next chapter should be up really soon. 


	2. Summer Day

Summer Day

**_Chapter II: Summer Day_**   
_A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds_   
_ are singing, and the lawn mower is broken._   
_ --James Dent_

  
The house at number four Privet Drive was completely normal. Everyday was the same, just as boring as the last, and just as boring as the next. But it was normal. Until the summer came. Every summer Vernon and Petunia Dursleys nephew came home for three months. Their nephew, you see, was a freak. Went to a school for Wizards and performed magic and everything. Completely unnormal, disrupting their usually normal household. But even with him there, they tried desperately to appear normal.   
Except for today. Today, the house was shaking.   
"BOY!!!" Vernon Dursley yelled, "You get down here and cut the grass! I told you to do it yesterday, so why isn't it done?!"   
Harry Potter, a fifteen-year-old wizard, bounded down the steps at his uncle's shout. Without a word he headed out to the garage to get out the mower. He went through the usual motions of filling it up with gas, pressing the starter and taking down the drainpipes. But when he went to start it, nothing happened. He cursed under his breath and tried again. Nothing. He called for his uncle and explained to him that the mower was broken.   
"Well why don't you use some of that magic," he spat out the word, as if it left a bitter taste in his mouth, "to get it started.   
"Icantusemagiconholiday." Harry mumbled under his breath, knowing that one of his two defenses, which were the only ways to ensure he made it through the summer alive, was gone.   
"What was that boy, I couldn't hear you?"   
"I can't use magic on holiday." Harry said quietly, not daring to look his uncle in the eye. Risking a quick glance up at his uncle, he felt a sinking feeling in his stomach.   
"Can't use magic, hmmm? Well, now, this is interesting." His fist suddenly shot out and clipped Harry on the left cheek. Harry stumbled back with the force of the contact.   
Harry was shocked. Never, in the fourteen years he had lived at number four Privet Drive had he been hit. Not like that anyway. He had been slapped many times when he was younger, but this was the first time since he had started Hogwarts that they had lay a hand on him. And it was certainly the first time he had ever been hit like that, with the much force. He felt the fear rising in his throat. His uncle knew he couldn't use magic, and after over a year without proof that he really did have a godfather, they were starting to suspect Harry had been lying. He was helpless. If Vernon hit him, there was no way he could fight back. He had grown that summer, now about five feet, seven and a half inches tall, but his uncle, a large, beefy man, was still much larger than Harry and could easily overpower him. Harry felt his natural instinct to flee take control of his legs and he began to run. He wasn't fast enough. Just as he turned away, Vernon grabbed the collar of Harry's shirt and violently yanked him back. Harry shut his eyes tight as he felt his uncle's closed fist slam into his back, causing him to gasp in pain. Only a moment later he felt the fist slam into the back of his skull. After that, everything went black.   


**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued **Author's Note:Yes, I know that once again, it was a short part, and there was no good stuff, but I'm building up to that. I mean I have to have a plot for you to understand anything that's going on, so please, just bear with me. And yes, the slash will be coming soon. Kudos to anyone who can correctly guess the main couple of the story. And please review!!!**   



	3. Two Roads

Two Roads **Author's Note:** Okay, here's the next chapter. Thoughts are in italics. **PLEASE REVIEW!!!!** I would love you forever!   
  
  


**_Chapter III: Two Roads_**   
_Two roads diverged in a woods, and I_   
_ I took the one less traveled by,_   
_ And that has made all the difference._   
_ --Robert Frost_

The first thing Harry became aware of when he awoke was that he couldn't see anything. The second thing he discovered was that he was in pain. Tremendous pain. He let out a scream. It was then that he opened his eyes to unfamiliar surroundings. Everything was white. _Is this Heaven?_ Harry asked himself. But he couldn't be dead. If he was dead, why was he still in pain? But then it occurred to him. _A hospital?_ He thought to himself, _the Dursleys would never take me to a hospital, there would be too much to explain._ But if it wasn't the Dursleys, how did he end up here? He shook his head, confused. Nothing was making sense. With these thoughts, the pain overtook him once more, and he again lost consciousness.   
He awoke again awhile later. This awaking was a bit more pleasant, he had to admit. He felt no pain, just a small discomfort in his back. He also seemed a bit more alert. There was no medical equipment around him, so he was either not at a hospital or he was at a Wizarding one. He suddenly felt frightened. _Where am I?_ He asked himself.   
The door to the room suddenly opened and Harry was relieved to see Dumbledore, followed by a great black dog, come through. The Headmaster smiled at him and took a seat next to his bed. "So Harry, are you feeling better?"   
Harry nodded. "I don't know which one of you two found me, but thank you for taking me away from there."   
Dumbledore gave him a small frown, as if in thought. "But Harry, it wasn't either of us that found you."   
"What? Than who could it have been?" Harry asked, looking confused.   
At that moment, Draco Malfoy came through the door. Harry was horrified. "What the HELL is he doing here?!" he yelled. He immediately regretted it. It felt as if his vocal cords had been set on fire.   
Dumbledore looked distressed at Harry's words. "Harry, Mr. Malfoy is the one who found you. He brought you here, to Hogwarts, where he knew you would be safe. He contacted me and told me that you had been beaten and I was able to get in contact with Snuffles," he emphasized the hidden meaning behind them name, as to remind Harry.   
"Malfoy found me?" Harry was shocked. "First, what was he doing anywhere near Privet Drive, and second why didn't he just kill me? Would've made Voldermort happy." Harry spat out, sending Malfoy a glare, which was equally returned.   
"Harry," Dumbledore began, "what I'm about to tell you cannot leave this room. Much like Professor Snape, Draco has become a spy, also at great personal risk. He approached me before he left on the train at the end of term. He, unlike Professor Snape, is not a Death Eater, but he does live with two of the highest-ranking Death Eaters among Voldermort's inner circle. Also, he did not find you on Privet Drive. Is that where this happened? Mr. Malfoy found you in a field, while on a mission for me, several miles from there." Dumbledore stopped for a moment to remove his glasses and rub his tired eyes. "Harry," he said quietly, "we had assumed you had been mugged, yet you had assumed you had been found at your aunt and uncle's home. Is that where this happened?" Harry refused to meet any of the other three's eyes, but all of them could see the fear on his face. "Harry, did your aunt or uncle do this to you?" Harry met Dumbledore's eye and nodded slowly. Dumbledore sighed sadly. "I'm sorry Harry. I feel as if this is my fault. I sent you to that place because I foolishly thought you would be safe there, even though I knew how they felt about our people. I was so sure that you would be protected there."   
There was silence after that. Draco Malfoy found himself looking at Harry in a whole new light. _So Potter's life isn't as perfect as I thought._ Draco even found himself feeling a little sorry for his enemy. _We've got to stop this enemy bullshit, he thought to himself. We're on the same side now._   
The silence continued for several more minutes until there was a POP and a man in black robes could be seen making his way to the door, shaking with rage. "Sirius!" Dumbledore called to him. "Come back and take a seat. Today is not the day you will have your revenge."   
Sirius looked outraged at even the notion he not do anything right now, "Now Dumbledore, you can't honestly expect…" But Harry cut him off.   
"Please Sirius, can you please stay here." The look on Harry's face was once again fear, fear that the closest thing he had to a parent would again leave him when he needed him the most. Leave him to deal with the pain alone. "Please, don't do this now. I don't want to be alone again, like it was after Cedric." The other three were shocked once more. Did Harry blame himself? Certainly he couldn't feel he was at fault for Cedric's death. But, obviously, he did. Sirius looked at him sadly.   
"It's okay Harry, I won't leave. Not yet. Get some rest, I'll be here when you wake up." Reassured, Harry let his eyes slip close and drifted off to sleep once again. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued


	4. Learned Young

Learned Young **Author's Note:** Okay here's the next part. Thsi si mostly thoughts and/or explanations, no dialouge whatsoever. Sorry. Thanks to those who have reviewed, and to Just Silver, I'm not so patiently waiting for the next chapter of Love and Darkness. I loved Fire and Ice and this one is promising to be just as good. To everyone else I would love you forever and ever and ever if you would just send me a wittle itty bitty review. And I would love you even longer if it wasn't so itty bitty. Now, really, is that so hard?**__**

  
**__**

**_Chapter IV: Learned Young_**   
_"Woe to the man whose heart has not learned while young to hope, to love - and to put its trust in life."_   
_ -Joseph Conrad_

Draco Malfoy was a very smart young man. He had always prided himself on that fact. But what he didn't understand was why Sirius Black, a convicted murderer, was promising Harry he would stay. Why did Harry want him to stay? Didn't he betray the Potter's, leading to their death? It didn't make sense. It appeared that Harry, as well as Dumbledore, were trusting this man. _But,_ Draco told himself, _I will not. I do not know him and I will not trust him._ He trusted Harry, surprisingly, as he knew that as much as Harry hated him, the good in him was stronger. Strangely, he felt a bit jaded knowing that Harry would never feel anything but hate for him. He trusted Dumbledore, as the man had taken a chance and trusted him. But anyone else was a different matter. Life was a different matter.   
At a young age, Draco had become weary of anyone he didn't know, as well as the ones he did. Much like Harry, he had never been shown much love, his parents being Death Eaters all. Love was a foreign emotion to him, one he had never felt or known. He had hardened his heart long ago and gave up on ever feeling anything for another person. But he could feel his resolve slowly slipping away from him and he was unable to stop it.   
Hope had been something he had long ago given up on. As a small child, he had often hoped for a different life. Different parents, different "friends", he wanted everything to be different. He wanted to be different. He knew what his parents were, and even at a young age he knew he could never be evil like that. But he also knew that if he stayed there, he would eventually lose sight of all that was good and pure and right in the world and he eventually would become just like his parents. This thought scared the young boy immensely. For years he struggled to hold on to the good he had inside him. As he got older it got harder and there were so many times he had come close to giving up and giving in. He knew that it would all just be so much easier if he gave up and let himself succumb to the evil he knew was lurking somewhere in his soul. Everyone, wizard and muggle alike, each had at least a drop of bad inside of them. He could often feel his bubbling just beneath the surface, fueled by the rage and hate towards his parents. He could feel it grow stronger. He started to imagine and even dream of doing some of the horrible deeds his father had often talked about. And it scared him.   
Trust was a luxury he could not afford. Trust could kill him. He hadn't been dealt a good hand in life, but he had played as well as he knew how. But he couldn't trust the deck. Life often threw him things he could hardly handle as it was, and he was convinced that one day, probably very soon, he would be thrown something he truly was not strong enough to fight. Even as he sat in Harry's room after the boy had gone back to sleep, he could feel the fight leaving him. He was growing weaker. It would be soon that he would be dealt a final round, one that he would not have the strength to win. He had long ago come to the terms that he was going to die. Probably alone, with no one to mourn him after her passed. That was part of the reason he had approached Dumbledore. He though if he could help, even just a little, before he died, maybe someone would miss him. Maybe he would have made a difference. Maybe someone would even cry, real, honest tears for him. Maybe he would finally earn the respect of Harry Potter. He couldn't understand why he wanted Harry's respect, even friendship, out of everyone he had ever met. Maybe because it was so difficult to obtain. Maybe because he could see a bit of himself in the other boy. Both had grown up without any love or compassion. Both were somewhat famous for things they had no control over or recollection of. Neither of them really wanted the attention they were given. They were so alike in many ways, yet they had turned out so different. Harry had found hope in coming to Hogwarts, finally away from the people who had made his life so miserable. But Draco knew he would never be rid of his parents. Not until they died. Or until he died, whichever came first. That may have been another reason he wanted Harry's companionship. Maybe the other boy could show him how to overcome the bad inside of him, to not be tempted by it. To be his friend, or maybe more. And maybe, just maybe he wouldn't be so alone anymore. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued


	5. Tomorrow

Tomorrow **Author's Note:** Okay, there's Ch 5, hope it wasn't to long a wait. I was out of town for a few days and then I had a bunch of schoolwork. Sorry about the delay. Hope to get Ch 6 out soon. Once again, thoughts are in italics. To everyone I would love you forever and ever and ever if you would just send me a wittle itty bitty review. And I would love you even longer if it wasn't so itty bitty. Now, really, is that so hard? Also, Kudos to those who DID take the time to review. A special Kudos to Abbey for the Draco quote. Sorry I stole it but I thought it fit in perfectly! Thanx a bunch!****

**Chapter V: Tomorrow**   
"_Think about all the tomorrows of your life"--Walter Dean Myers, Monster_   


When Harry awoke, he was surprised to see both Malfoy and Sirius sitting by his bedside. Sirius was dozing off slightly and Harry decided to let him sleep a while, as he looked tired. Malfoy though, was wide- awake and watching his every move with weary eyes. He was slumped over in the chair. To Harry it looked as if he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. _Then again, maybe he does_ Harry thought to himself. He found himself feeling sorry for Malfoy, who looked utterly miserable at the moment. Sighing, Harry decided to get the inevitable over with. Malfoy, whether he liked it or not, had saved his life. He cleared his voice to get the other boy's attention.   
"I just…wanted to thank you for helping me out there. You saved my life." Harry sounded horrible, but to Draco Malfoy, those words were the sweetest he had ever heard come out of Harry's mouth to date and he savored the moment.   
Giving the slightly smaller boy a smirk that didn't quite reach his eyes or hide his exhaustion, Malfoy replied, "I accept your spontaneous expression of gratitude with humility and smugness."   
Harry glared at him, but he could see the insecurity hovering just beneath the surface of the other boy's face. This surprised him. Malfoy had always seemed very sure of himself, no matter the situation. His coolness was something Harry had disliked, but he strangely found himself respecting it. He also found himself really seeing Draco Malfoy for the first time. Before, when he had looked at his antagonist, he had only felt strong dislike and disgust. Now for the first time he looked beyond all that. His feathery silver blond hair was mussed and unordered. His grey eyes penetrated Harry's green ones, making Harry feel as if Draco could see straight to his soul. His delicate features gave him a feminine look, but not in an unpleasant way. _In fact,_ Harry thought to himself, _he looks rather handsome._   
Where the hell had that come from? It wasn't the shock of admiring a boy sexually, he had know for a little over a year he was gay, and had come to terms with it a long time ago. It was the fact that it was Malfoy he was admiring. As his thoughts turned back to the other boy, he groaned. He felt himself becoming slightly excited. _Stop,_ he told himself, _this is not the time to be thinking of things like this. I know, I'll think about it tomorrow, tomorrow my mind will be clearer._ Little did Harry know the only things that would become clearer involving Draco was the attraction he had towards the other boy. 

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**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued 


	6. Live Forever, Die Today

Live Forever Die Today

_Chapter VI: Live Forever, Die Today_   
_"Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today."_   
_- James Dean_

For the second time that day, Draco was confused. He had never truly hated Harry, he had known that. He had been jealous, while at the same time admiring him. But now, he felt other feelings. Feelings of passion and attraction. These scared him. Lust was something he could understand. He was a fifteen-year-old boy. He was a walking hormone, a hornball. But what he was feeling couldn't be honestly aquatinted with love. But love, love was another matter.   
Draco dreamt that one day he would be able to love someone and they, in return, would love him equally. But he figured that to be only a dream. One of many that he prayed would one day occur but doubted the likelihood of happening. For one, he felt he was incapable of such feelings. Two, he felt he didn't deserve these things. Three, he doubt he would live long enough for it to happen. He wasn't going to live forever, and that's how long it would take. But he dreamt as if he would.   
That was another thing. Draco never knew from one moment to the next if he was going to die with the next breath he took. So he lived for the moment. He took no chances. He left nothing for 'later', as he knew, for him, there might never be a later. He lived his life, no regrets. Though, like all people he did have some. But few. He lived as if he were to die that day.   
These thoughts ran through the blonde's head as he watched Harry sleep. It was at this point he stopped, his thoughts interrupted by the fact that Harry was waking up. It was at this moment that Harry looked the most beautiful that Draco had ever seen him. He couldn't take the chance. His developing feelings for the other boy were too strong. He had to do it. Harry may really hate him forever now, but it would be worth the risk as far as he was concerned. He checked on Sirius, to see that the man was still asleep in his chair. This was it; there was no turning back. Moving to face Harry again, Draco took two steps and was at the side of Harry's bed. Looking down he stared into those green, confused eyes. He knew that he had to do it. Damning the consequences, at that moment, Draco leaned down and pressed his lips to Harry's. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued

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**Author's Note:** Okay, sorry it took awhile. I hope to have the next Chapter out soon. Knock on wood. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. If I get alot of reviews, I'll take it you want me to continue. If I don't...well, Summer does start Fri. at 11:40 am and I don't want to waste my summer on a story no one likes. So tell me what you think. Loves ya!   



	7. Possession

Possession

**_Chapter VII: Possession_**   
_And I would be the one_   
_ To hold you down_   
_ Kiss you so hard_   
_ I'll take your breath away_   
_ And after, I'd wipe away the tears_   
_ Just close your eyes dear_   
_Sarah McLachlan – Possession_

Harry awoke, surprised to see Draco standing over him. A moment later, he was even more shocked to feel the other boy'' lips on his. His own lips parted slightly on shock. This gave Draco the advantage and he slipped his tongue into Harry's mouth. It ran along the back of his teeth and playfully stroked along the length of Harry's tongue. Harry moaned. He was surprised to discover that he was enjoying this. Following the other boy's lead, his tongue battled with Draco's.   
Even after coming to terms with being gay, Harry had never kissed a boy. Hell, he had never kissed anyone before, but Draco was a good teacher. By this time, both boys were moaning quietly in pleasure, when suddenly, Draco pulled away, gasping for air. The need to breathe had finally become too strong. Harry opened his eyes to look at the other boy questioningly. He was surprised to see tears in Draco's eyes.   
Draco looked down at Harry sadly. He couldn't believe he had just kissed THE Harry Potter. What was even more unbelievable was that Harry had returned the kiss, just as enthusiastically. For those few, brief seconds, Draco felt a happiness he had never before experienced. He felt a tear slip down his cheek and quickly wiped it away, but it was soon followed by another and another and any attempt at keeping them hidden was useless.   
Harry was surprised by the tears running down Draco's cheeks, he hadn't thought Malfoy capable of such emotion. Even thought the boy cried silently, Harry could feel his pain emitting from him and he suddenly felt sorry for him. He reached up and gently wiped away the other boy's tears. When Draco's sobs had finally died down to a few tears, Harry pulled the other boy towards him until their foreheads were touching. Their lips were only a breath a way from each other, but Harry made no move to kiss the other boy. "Close your eyes," Harry whispered, his breath tickling along Draco's lips and chin. The other boy did what he was told without question. Moving in slightly, Harry brushed his lips over Draco's closed eyelids, down the right side of his face until he finally encountered his lips, where he softly kissed the other boy. He held the kiss for a moment before he pushed harder against the other boy. It wasn't long before Harry was kissing Draco with enough force to leave bruises. Then, with a strength that surprised both of them, Harry reached up and pulled Draco onto the bed and stood up, finally pulling out of the tight embrace, but continued to hold the other boy down. He lent down so his face was inches away from the other boy's and framed the delicate face with his hands. "What's wrong? What made you stop?" 

"I needed to breathe." Draco replied, his voice dull. 

"What are you hiding from me?" Harry asked, a few tears slipping down his own cheeks. 

"Why are you crying?" Draco asked, wiping away Harry's tears. 

"Because you are." Harry answered simply. 

Draco sighed. He hadn't expected this much emotion. Brushing his hand down Harry's cheek, he whispered. "There's a lot you don't know about me. But please, just give me time, I'll be able to tell you eventually. I know it's a lot to ask, but I need to take the time to build up to the point when I'll be able to tell you." 

Harry nodded. "As long as you are okay for now, that will be fine. Are you going to be okay?" 

Draco shrugged his shoulders, "I don't know. Am I okay right now? Yes, and that kiss certainly has changed my perspective on a lot of things. Will I be able to keep it up? I don't know, only time will tell." 

"I don't like the sound of that." 

"It's the best I can give you." 

"I suppose it'll do." 

"That's good, cause it'll have too." 

There was silence for a few moments after that. Eventually, Harry lay back down on the bed, resting his head on the other boy's shoulder. They both knew that the problems were by no means solved, but they could wait for another day. The had both found a sense of inner peace neither had ever felt before when they were with each other, and for now, that was enough. 

Unbeknownst to both boys, a man in the hall watched them quietly. He looked deep in thought for a moment and ran his hand through his long grey beard. Then his blue eyes began he twinkled and giving the boy's one more long glance, he smiled. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued

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**Author's Note:** Well, I've decided to continue the story for now, but if it seems like no one is reading, I'll stop. Today, at 11:35 a.m. I was officially freed. Eighth grade is finally over. I'm finally a Freshman!!! Just though I'd share my good news. I hope to have the next chapter out soon. Please, please, please review! Remember what I said!   



	8. Beginnings

Beginnings

_Chapter VIII: Beginnings_   
_"All glory comes from daring to begin."--Eugene F. Ware_

The two boys slept. For several hours, the only noise that could be heard from the room was the soft breathing of the two boys, and the quiet snores coming from Sirius. When the morning light did begin to break through the window, it was Harry who woke first. For a moment, he was a bit confused as to where he was, but a moment later it all came back to him. All the happenings of the night before came rushing back all at once. Looking up at Draco's face from his position with his head resting on his chest, a smile came to his face and his green eyes twinkled in a way that had been lacking since the night of Voldermort's return. The night Cedric had died.   
Harry shook his head to rid himself of these thoughts. For the next good fifteen minutes, he just watched Draco sleep. That was about when the other boy started to stir and Harry couldn't let him sleep any longer. He leaned up and gave the other boy a lingering kiss on the lips, which was enough to finish waking the other boy up. Draco smiled down at Harry and brushed a lock of hair out of his eyes, whispering, "We need to talk." 

Harry looked surprised, "I thought you said you weren't ready." 

Draco shook his head. "I'm not. That's not we need to talk about." 

"Then what is it?" 

"First thing, what is Sirius Black doing here, and why did you want him to stay?" 

"He's my godfather. He's innocent you know. I won't explain everything right now, but he is innocent whether you believe me or not." 

Draco could tell Harry was getting worked up and knew it couldn't be good for him in the state of health he was currently in. "Don't worry, I believe you, just calm down, you're gonna hurt yourself even worse." 

"Like you'd care," Harry muttered under his breath. Draco heard him. 

"Well, I thought that that kiss would have made it clear that I do care." 

"Or that you were just tryin' to get some." 

Draco looked sincerely hurt by that comment. "You really think that's the only reason I kissed you?" 

Harry sighed, suddenly tired again. "No, but come on Draco. Four years of having to watch my back isn't going to just disappear you know. I do believe you, but there is still a little doubt lurking in the back of my mind." 

"I never really hated you, and I'm sorry for all that, I really am. If I could take it all back I would, I'd take it back in a second, but I can't. I was just hoping we would be able to get past that." 

"Oh God, we will Draco, if we do it together, but you are going to have to be patient. It's going to take time and a lot talking, along with a mess of trust on both our parts, but eventually; we will get past it. I promise you that. Already, just the thought of what we can become, the two of us, means so much to me, and I would do almost anything to preserve that. I care so much already, when I finally do get to the point where it is real, true love, as I know it eventually will be, I don't know how I'm going to be able to be away from you. Even right now, the knowing that when school starts in September and we have to go back to hating each other in public is so much more than I can comprehend. I don't know if I'll be able to pretend I hate you and still have these emotions coursing through my veins at the exact same time. But I'll do it, I'll make myself do it, because your safety depends upon it, and that is so much more important to me. I want to shout to the world that you're mine, but I'll keep locked behind sealed lips and tongue until the time comes that I can shout it out how much I care for you and what we are together. Because I do care for you, not love quite yet, but it'll come in time. And so will the day we can be together and not have to hide it from our friends and family," Harry paused to throw a quick glance at Sirius, "but we are just going to have to wait it out by taking it one day at a time. But I truly believe that if we are truly meant to be, if we take each day together, we will survive it and both of us will come out stronger in the end." 

Draco looked surprised for a moment by the conviction he could hear behind Harry's words, but then he smiled and kissed Harry softly. "I think you're right, Harry. I think you just may be right." 

To Harry those were the sweetest words he had ever heard come out of Draco's mouth. Not that he was right, but the fact that he called him Harry. "Say it again," he whispered. 

"What, that you're right?" Draco asked, a confused look on his face. 

Harry shook his head and smiled at Draco with something akin to love, "No, Draco. My name." 

Draco smiled as well at that. Leaning in he kissed Harry softly and whispered, "Harry" before kissing him again, this one much longer and much more passionate. When he finally pulled away a few minutes later, the two were silent for quite some time, basking in the new role they had in the other's life. 

It was Harry who broke the silence first. "I must say, I think the two of us have made a beginning." 

Draco smiled at that. "Someone once said 'All glory comes from daring to begin' I think they were right." 

"Well, we've dared to begin, and I truly believe that eventually we will achieve glory. Not just in the war that we both know is coming, but also in us." 

Draco nodded his agreement. "I think that given the chance, you're probably right. As you said it's going to take a lot of talking and trust, as well as a bunch of patience and forgiveness, but at least we've made a start." 

Harry nodded against Draco's shoulder, and, remembering a poem he had once read murmured, only loud enough for the two of them to hear,   
"Together or not,   
I'm keeping you in my heart.   
It's our first day together,*   
And we've got a good start." 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued ****

**Author's Note:** Okay, I hoped you all enjoyed that. As always, reviews are what will keep this story alive. I want to thank several people as well. When I read your reviews, man, I thought Iwas gonna cry. You guys rock! So I send a thank you and kudos out to ExCueTee (short but still sweet), Coqui (remember what I told you, it'll come eventually), Pheonixx (guess we're in the same boat then), Cali (I'm pretty happy about it myself), Allie (as for now, I guess I won't be), and Nykto (your pretty damn convincing). I hope to have the next chapter out soon, knock on wood. So until then, I'll be seesing ya!   
*= change of line to fit story   
PS I f you like the poem, mention it in your review and I can tell you the title and get you the whole thing. 


	9. Live it With Hope

Live It With Hope

_Chapter IX: Live it With Hope_   
_"No matter how difficult life can be the most important thing is to_   
_ Live it with hope."—Anonymous_

The two lay there for awhile, not saying a word. They simply enjoyed the new feelings of joy coursing through their veins. Eventually though, they realized that they couldn't remain in this position. Bu an unspoken agreement, they had decided that, for now, they weren't going to tell anyone about their relationship. Harry would even keep it from Sirius, and as he would be doing so, Draco had to move back to a chair before Sirius woke up, since it would be quite difficult to explain why Sirius woke to find the two sharing a bed. 

After Draco had moved to a chair, the two kept sneaking glances at each other, neither quite believing what had recently just happened between the two. After about a half -hour of this, Sirius woke with a start, startling both the boys. As soon as the older man remembered where he was, he was at Harry's bedside, making sure the boy was all right, that the pain was better and that he was comfortable. 

"Sirius, I swear to you, I'm fine. It hurts a little in my lower back, but I'll live." He gave his godfather a crooked smile, one that reminded Sirius so much of James. 

"Alright Harry, I get it. It's just that… well, you know I worry about you." 

Draco cleared his throat quietly, getting the other two's attention; "I'm going to talk to Dumbledore. I'll ask him when you can leave Ha- Potter." With that, Draco turned and left the room. 

Sirius and Harry watched him go. When the door was completely shut behind him, Sirius turned back to face Harry. "What happened between you and the Malfoy boy?" 

Harry tried to look like he had no idea what Sirius was talking about. "Sirius, what are talking about?" 

"You know what I mean. When I went to sleep you two were glaring at each other, hating the fact that the other was even in the same room. Now, you're on a first name basis and the tension is gone. So tell me, what happened?" 

"Well, we've come to an agreement. We're on the same side now; we have to stop this enemy bullshit if we hope to have a chance against Voldermort. In public we'll still act like we hate each other, as Malfoy's safety depends upon it, but in private, we've agreed to try to be friends." Harry felt guilty about lying to his godfather, but he was terrified that if he told the truth, the closest thing he had to a parent, and someone he cared for very deeply, would shun him. 

Sirius nodded, "I'm impressed Harry. That's very mature of the two of you. It's only to bad that Snape and I have been at odds to long, or I would suggest the same for us. However, we've hated each other for over twenty years, and we've done too much to each other to just be able to forgive and forget. If there is one thing we have in common, it's that both of us will hold a grudge longer then anyone else I have ever known." 

**§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§**   
**In Dumbledore's Office**

"Hello Draco, is there something I can help you with?" Dumbledore asked, upon seeing the boy enter his office. 

"Yes, sir. Har- er, Potter was wondering when he would be able to leave. Besides, I got the hint that Black wanted to talk to him in private." 

"Ah yes. Well, Madam Pomfrey has informed me that Mr. Potter will be able to leave the Hospital wing some time tomorrow as long as he promises to take it easy. I'm sure Sirius will make sure he does. However, like you, Mr. Potter will be spending the rest of the summer here. Returning to his aunt and uncle's his out of the question." 

"I figured he would stay with the Weasleys." 

"Yes, that idea occurred to me, but it really is much safer for everyone involved if he stay here. Besides, it will make it easier on the two of you. What with a budding relationship, it's easier if the two people are near each other. It is also much more enjoyable that way, if I remember correctly." 

Draco's cheeks flushed slightly. "Sir, I don't know what you're talking about." 

"Draco, I saw you and Harry kissing. Now, it's certainly nothing to be embarrassed about. What I saw between the two of you was love, and love, even in it's earliest forms, is nothing to be ashamed of." 

"I only wish everyone felt the way you do sir. It would make everything so much easier, especially for Harry." 

"And for you as well." 

"But it's different. Harry has a godfather and friends who care about him. He's afraid of their rejection, and I'm afraid of what their rejection might do to him. The only person who truly cares for me is Harry, and I could give a damn about anyone else's opinion. So yes, it would make it easier on both of us, but it would only matter if it makes it easier for him." 

"The only advice I really have to offer you is not to give up hope, either of you. I understand that right now, you want to keep your relationship a secret, and that's fine. But you will get to a point where you want to tell other people, especially those close to you. You never know, they may be completely fine with it. In my experience, your friends often know almost everything about you, whether you tell them or not. In fact, I would be surprised if neither Hermoine nor Ron ever had a clue that Harry was a gay. The three of them are quite close and they probably figured it out long ago, and are both fine with it." 

"I hope you're right sir." 

"Draco, life is hard; that is a fact I'm sure both you and Harry learned long ago. But you must live it with hope. Hope for a better tomorrow, hope for understanding. That is one of the most important things I can tell you." 

"Yes sir." Draco turned to leave the office. 

"And Draco, as I'm sure you're going back to Harry's room, would you mind telling Sirius that I need to speak with him?" 

"I'll tell him sir." 

**§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§**

When Draco reached the Hospital Wing, he told Sirius that Dumbledore needed to see him, and Harry's godfather, giving a quick good-bye to Harry, turned and made his way out of the room. As soon as he was gone, Draco made his way over to Harry's bed and kissed him softly on the lips. 

Harry smiled softly as the other boy pulled away. "I take it you have good news." 

Draco nodded. "You can leave tomorrow, but you'll be spending the rest of the summer here, as will I." 

"That's great." Harry smiled excitedly. 

"There's more. Dumbledore knows about us, and he's completely fine with it. He also said that when we get around to telling Ron and Hermoine, he wouldn't be surprised if they knew you were gay and were fine with it." 

"Why, is that obvious?" 

"No, he just said that best friends often know almost everything about you, whether you ever actually tell them or not." 

"I just hope they really are fine with it. Them and Sirius. He's the closest thing I have to a father and his opinion really does mean a lot to me." 

"I know it does. I was worried about that also. Dumbledore said that no matter how difficult life may get, it's of the utmost importance that we live it with hope. I think he's right." 

"He is. I was just scared there for a moment. If they do reject me, maybe they never really cared about me in the first place. But even so, I'll still have you. I think that will be enough." 

"I hope I am enough. But we both know having people who care would help an awful lot." 

Harry sighed, "Yeah, it would. But you know what?" 

"What?"   
  
"We aren't telling them about it yet, and it's no use worrying about it until we do. What happens will happen, and know that when it does, I'll be there to meet it." With that, Harry captured Draco's lips with his own, and neither spoke for quite awhile after that. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued

****

**Author's Note: Jeez, I could just scream! Do you know what a bitch writer's block is? Well, some of you at least probably do. Anyways, there's Chapter Nine, and I hope you all enjoyed it. I hope to have Ten out soon. Now, I would be much obliged if you all could show me some love and review. This is the ninth chapter and I don't even have 30 reviews. It feels like no one is reading. Come on people, if you want me to keep going with this story, you got to tell me. Despite popular belief, I'm not telepathic. Show me some love!**


	10. Birthdays and Rides

Birthdays and Rides

_Chapter X: Birthdays and Rides_   
_Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride_   
_ worthwhile.--Franklin P. Jones_

__

The days after that flew by. Sirius stayed, much to the enjoyment of Harry, and he spent much of the time with his godson, telling him anything and everything about the boy's parents. The time that they didn't spend together, Harry spent with Draco. Sirius, still in the dark about the true nature of their relationship, thought the boys were just off doing the things normal teenage boys did together. Hanging out, playing Quidditch, things that he and James had done. And, in a sense, he was right. The two were doing things normal teenage boys did. Things Sirius and James had done quite often. Only James had done them with Lily. The two were very Sirius about making their relationship work and while they did spend much of the time making out and having snog sessions, they also spent much of their time together just talking. They were doing their best to get to know each other. The problem was, both boys were having trouble opening up. Their childhood hadn't come up once, almost as if the whole subject was taboo. Harry was nervous enough telling Sirius about it and his godfather couldn't break up with him. Slowly, he was making headway with Sirius, as his godfather was being very understanding, though he did often have to calm him down and stop him from hunting Vernon Dursley down right then. But Draco was another matter. For one thing, Harry was afraid Draco wouldn't want to be with someone who carried around that much emotional baggage. For another, he didn't wasn't his boyfriend pitying him. He did want anybody's pity. Draco was afraid to open up for both the same reasons. Not knowing Harry's past, or very little of it, he was afraid Harry would think he was high maintenance and not worth the effort. He was also afraid that Harry would change his mind, yet stay with him out of pity for the other boy. So the last week of June and the first 30 days of July passed without resolve. 

Before anyone knew it, it was July 31. Harry's fifteenth birthday. Sirius had though about having a small get together, but ever since his uncle's beating, Harry had seemed a little weary around anyone but him, Draco, and Dumbledore. Sirius only hoped it would fade away by the time school started again. Once it did, he would have to leave, to ensure he wasn't seen by the wrong people and on a mission for Dumbledore. Harry and Draco would back to pretending to hate each other, and Sirius was afraid that Harry would become quiet and despondent, therefore only making himself feel worse about the situation. But, Sirius supposed they would have to deal with that when and if it happened. For now, he had two people he was able to talk to and it was his birthday. It was a time to celebrate. And Sirius was determined to celebrate, even if it was just he, Draco and Harry. 

For the duration of the summer, both Harry and Draco were staying in the Gryfindorr dorms, while Sirius stayed in a room to himself in the teacher's wing. At midnight, July 31, Harry found himself sitting by the window, just watching the night sky. As long as he could remember, he had done this on his birthday. He didn't understand while was still doing it, he was happier then he had ever been before, but yet again, here he was. He sat there for awhile, he had lost track of the time, when he was surprised to feel a pair of arms wrap around his middle and a pair of lips come to rest on his ear. 

"Happy Birthday, Harry." Draco whispered. 

"For the first time that I can remember, I think it will be." 

"I'm pretty sure Sirius is determined to make sure that it will be. He really cares for you." 

"I know. That's why I worry about him. What if he gets caught, just because he was trying to protect me?" 

"I think he considers it to be worth the risk." 

"Well I don't! I'm not worth Azkaban, much less the Dementor's Kiss!" 

Draco looked at Harry sadly, "Oh Harry. You are worth so much more than you will ever realize. I mean, first off, look at all you've done already." 

Harry twisted around in his boyfriend's arms, a look of anger replacing sorrow. "I am so sick of that! I haven't done anything! It was my mum's protection that defeated Voldermort; I had nothing to do with it. Since then, it's not like I've gone looking for things to defeat. They found me, and yes, I survived, but barely! And this last time, yes, I survived once again, but the cost was someone else's life. I should have been the one to die not Cedric." 

"Harry, you can't compare things like that. You can't often compare the actual value of a life. It is not your fault Cedric died. You did everything you could to prevent it, and it happened anyway. So you fulfilled his final wish and brought his body back to his parents. That is what he had wanted. That's as much as you could have done. It's as much as anyone could have done." 

"But it wasn't enough!! Don't you get it? No matter what everyone says, he died because of me. He DIED Draco, and he's not coming back. And that is on my hands." 

Harry tried to pull away at that, but Draco grabbed his hands and held them within his own, rubbing the cool, clammy skin in an effort to warm them. "Harry, stop it. Please, Sirius is worried about you. Dumbledore is worried about you. I'm worried about you. I'm afraid that if you keep placing the blame on yourself for something that is in no way your fault, you'll eventually snap. I can't lose you Harry. You're all I've got anymore. My parents, well, you know…" 

Harry cut him off then, "At least you have parents." 

"Harry, your parents died trying to save your life. Do you know what that says about how much they loved you?" 

"Oh my God," Harry whimpered. 'Fuck. Fuck. All I am is a danger to anyone stupid enough to care about me. All I ever do is hurt the ones I care about the most. Jesus, I must be the worst damn thing that ever happened to you…" 

"God DAMN it!" Draco took Harry and shook him like a terrier shakes a rat. "STOP! Just STOP!" 

Their gazes locked, in pain and anguish, both of them wide-eyed and terrified. Draco's eyes closed slowly in misery as the past few moments sunk in, then opened in horror. 

"Oh my dear Lord, Harry, I didn't mean to - tell me I didn't hurt you…" 

They stared at each other for what seemed an interminable time of agony and suspense. Then Harry clutched Draco to him, crushingly, with a raw need and desperation that hurt to watch. "Never," he murmured, "never. Never. Never...." 

"If I ever raise a hand to you, Harry, I swear I'd shoot myself…" 

"Then we'd be headed straight for Hell together, Draco: I cannot, I will not live without you – I don't think I would be able to do it." 

"I just shook you 'til your teeth rattled, Hon, I can't believe I…" 

"You had every right, like slapping a woman who's having hysterics…" 

"I don't think I could ever raise my hand to a woman ... course I thought I could never ever touch you in anger, but I did…" 

"Baby, please, stop beating yourself up." 

"But…" 

"If I have to, you have to." 

"You told me about your life. What your father did to you, everything else that was done to you, that was not your fault. If I have to stop blaming myself, so do you." 

Draco quivered from sheer tension then seemed to collapse, like a bow unstrung, against his love. 

"Draco, my precious, precious Draco. God, I sound like the queen. But you are precious. Fuck the macho bullshit. If I'm not dangerous, it's because you say so. Well, I say none of that was your fault." 

"Don't. Harry. Just... don't." Draco closed his eyes in pain. "I've never wanted to... to talk about... look, my life before you is just something I... well, I mean nothing before you matters, anyway…" 

"It matters, Draco. It made you who you are, and I love every fiber of your damn being, so it matters. It matters to me." 

"I've tried so hard to forget it." 

"I know you have. But we're going to work through it, all of it, just the two of us. And I promise I will be there every step of the way. Whatever road you travel in this life Draco, I will always be right behind you." 

Draco gave his love a small smile, "Not behind me. Beside me." He kissed Harry then, one full of whispers of love and promises of what was to come. 

**§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§**

It was much later that day when Harry first experienced a birthday celebration. Sirius joined him and Draco in the Gryfindorr common room, bringing with him a small cake a several presents. 

Lighting the candles on the cake, Sirius told Harry to make a wish. He thought about it for a moment, then leaned down and blew out all fifteen with one big breath. 

"Happy Birthday Harry! Now, do you want to eat or open your presents first?" Sirius asked. 

"Let's eat first." Harry decided. So Sirius cut the cake in to three large pieces and the three of them ate in silence. And yet, the whole experience was still so incredible for Harry. He was with two of the most important people in his life and he could feel their affection for him radiating in waves. 

When they were done eating, they moved to sit in the chairs near the fireplace. Harry sat with his presents spread out around him. He couldn't believe he had gotten so many. He had never gotten this many before. The first he opened was from Ron. It was a chess set with a note that Harry was to practice, because Ron wanted better competition this year. He opened Hermoine's next. There were several books along with a framed photo of them and Ron at the Winter Ball from the previous year. It was a wizard photo, so the people waved and smiled at him. Next was a gift from the twins, and Harry was unsurprised to find a large supply of dung bombs (new and improved from Weasley's Wizardly Wheezes), Canary Cremes, Ton-Tongue Toffee, and assorted other items, along with a note once again thanking Harry for the money. After that was a gift from Ginny (she had grown out of her crush stage over the past year, but the two remained friends). It, like Hermoine's, was more sentimental. She had given him several framed photos. There was one of the two of them, Harry giving Ginny a vicious noogie. One was of Harry, grasping the Snitch in his hand. He recognized the picture from the Quidditch tournament his third year. Another was of Harry and Ron playing a prank on some Slytherins. The next one was of Harry, Ron, Dean, Seamus, the twins, and Lee Jordan. Harry remembered it had been taken on one of their trips to Hogsmeade, where they all forgot their problems and had fun. That brought him to the last picture which surprised him. It was one of him and Sirius. Ginny had known about Sirius, and yet she had done nothing and told no one. Harry smiled. 

The rest of the day Harry spent with Sirius and Draco, trying not to think about all that was wrong in his life. And it worked for the most part. Harry didn't realize till he went to bed that night that he had told Draco he loved him. He worried about it for a few minutes until he finally realized that, while he said it, he did mean it. He loved Draco. 

But that didn't mean the problems weren't still there, as Harry was soon to find out. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued

****

**Author's Note:** Well, there's chapter 10, I hope you all enjoyed it. Once again, the lack of reviews makes mr think that no one is reading, so I may end the story if it continues, so if you like this tory, please review. Anyways, if I continue, I hope to have Ch 11 out soon, so stay tuned. Hey, I'm a poet, but I do know it. I rhyme in good time. OKay I'm done. Till next time,   
Emily   
  



	11. Sooner or Later

Sooner or Later

**_Chapter XI: Sooner or Later_**   
_Sooner or later you'll learn_   
_ Sooner or later you'll cry_   
_ Sooner or later you'll learn_   
_ That you can't live a day without him* in your life_   
_--BB Mak ~ Sooner or Later_

The days were growing shorter and the leaves on the trees were beginning to fall. Both boys tried to ignore that the beginning of school was fast approaching, but it was none the less. The start of term was something both dreaded. It meant the end to their blissful time together. It would shatter the freedom they had, even though they were still hiding the relationship from Sirius. Harry feared it would shatter all chances at making the relationship work as well. But even more, Harry feared, was that if their relationship did fail, he too would shatter. This scared him. He had never really known love, except from Sirius and Ron and Hermoine, and he had never seen how his parents acted around each other. He had never seen love before, and the feelings he felt now where overwhelming. 

Draco, though worried about the starting of term, was nervous for other reasons as well. He was terrified that the time would come when Harry decided it was time they discussed his past. Yes, he had told Harry what had happened, but they had never discussed it. Draco had told him and then the subject had been changed. And it had stayed this way. Draco liked it this way. It kept away the hurt; it kept away the pain. 

Unbeknownst to Draco, Harry had figured this much out already. But he did know some things Draco didn't. He knew that sooner or later, Draco would crack. And he would be there to pick up the pieces when he did. 

Sooner or later, Draco would finally learn. Harry was there for him, and he always would be, as long as Draco would let him anyway. He would learn that he had a shoulder to lean on, a soul to depend upon, and a lover to… well, love. He would learn that Harry wasn't about to desert him at the first sign of trouble. Sooner or later he would learn. 

Sooner or later he would cry. Harry knew this. Someday, maybe someday soon, the wall Draco had built around his heart would crumble, and with it, the torrent of emotions he had been holding back all these years would be released. And he would cry. He would cry himself to exhaustion. And Harry would be there for him, holding him, comforting him. But he would still cry. 

Sooner or later he would figure out that he needed Harry. He needed him in his life. Preferably next to him, holding his hand, but as long as he was there, loving him as Draco loved him, than Draco believed he may be able to survive. The chances were still out of his favor, but they were better, closer to being fair. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued

**Author's Note:** Okay, I realize that was short, but I'm having writer's block (again! I know what I want to happen, now I just have to get there). I hope the next chapter will be much longer and out very soon. As always, if you want the story to continue, please review. Thank you to all those who have reviewed already!! You guys are the best. Until next time, go see Pearl Harbor, because Ben Affleck and Josh Hartnett are really HOT! If you've seen it already, go see it again!   
Love ya's,   
_Padfootsgirl_


	12. A Switching of Roles

A Switching of Roles

**Chapter XII: A Switching of Roles**   
_A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist_   
_ sees the opportunity in every difficulty.--Sir Winston Churchill_

The tension of both boys finally came to head one day in late August. Neither had been in a good mood as of late, the stress of next week becoming too much. Deep down, both boys knew that a confrontation would soon occur, and still, neither was ready for it when it did. 

The day had started out simple enough. They had eaten breakfast and had sat at the tale for awhile, not saying anything. Harry had finally broken the silence and suggested they go for a walk around the lake. For the past weeks since Harry had arrived, the lake had been a favorite place of both of them. It was somewhere they could go to just get away from everything. However, despite Harry's plan, Fate had other things in mind. Their troubles followed them to the lake, and finally surfaced completely. 

They arrived at the lake hand in hand and for several minutes they just walked silently, trying to savor the moment, knowing that similar ones would soon become few and far between. After a while, Harry, who still was not fully recovered, became tired and sat down on one of the many rocks that lined the shore of the lake. Still keeping a hold on his boyfriend's hand, he pulled Draco down next to him. Still they were silent until finally Draco broke the stained silence. 

"So, three more days 'til term starts." 

Harry nodded in agreement, "It's gonna be hard." 

"I know, but it's worth it." 

"Is it really?" 

"What?" Draco was shocked. For a moment he didn't know what to think. Then he started to panic. "Harry, no, don't start this. Of course it's worth it." 

"I don't know. We have to pretend to hate each other all the time; we'll never have time alone. I'll be lying to everybody I care about." 

"What, didn't you ever care about me? Or were you just trying to get me to fuck you?" 

Harry was stunned at how crude Draco was being. "Of course I care about you, you know that. It's because I care about you that…" Harry paused to gather his strength, "well, maybe we should call it quits. It's hard enough as it is right now and it's only going to get harder. Our lives are hard enough already, we shouldn't purposely try to complicate them further." 

"No…no, Harry don't do this to me. You can't do this." 

But Harry obviously could and he was. "Draco, give it up. It'll be to complicated, it's not worth it." 

"So that's it!? Every time something gets a little complicated you're just going to give up? God Harry, I thought we were stronger than that. We ARE stronger than that. We're better than that." 

"Draco, it's not going to work." Harry turned away from him then, trying not to cry. 

"So that's it then? You're just giving up. You know, I thought you were stronger than that. Braver than that. Some Gryfindorr you are. You know what Harry? You're just a coward. You're too afraid to get close to me, to afraid that I might actually love you and treat you like a decent human being. You're too afraid to take a chance on someone else. No, you have to go lock yourself away, build that damn wall around your heart; one that's so strong no one can break through. You do it because your afraid that anyone who does break through will just use you and you'll lose. Well you know what? You're going to lose anyway. In fifty years, you'll look back and finally realize how alone you are. And you'll be sorry. I love you Harry, I really do, and someday you're gonna realize that. What really hurts me though is that you can't realize it today. We could be so happy together, if you would just let me in. Let me in Harry, I promise, I will never hurt you and I won't abuse the gift. Please." The last word was a plea and tears started to slip down Draco Malfoy's face. 

"You don't understand. I don't know from one day to the next if I'll survive. You don't have to live like that. I put everyone around me in danger. You don't want that. You don't love me. It's lust. And if you keep up with this shit, it'll get you killed." 

"No, you're the one that doesn't fucking understand! Living without you isn't really living for me. Any danger I may be in is so much smaller than the chance that we'll be so happy if you let us!" By now Draco was screaming, trying to get it through Harry's head. 

But Harry refused to hear it. "No. It's over Draco. Just stay away from me, and I'll stay away from you." With this he stalked off, afraid Draco would see the tears streaming down his face. 

But Draco didn't follow him. He fell to the ground, curling up into a fetal position, tears falling rapidly down his face. To Harry's retreating back, which was by now very far away, he whispered. "You can't leave me Harry. I love you. Please don't do this to me. You're all I have." With that, he broke down in sobs. He didn't even have the strength to try and keep them at bay. _'A little over a month'_ Draco thought to himself, _'we were only together for a little over a month and already I don't think I can live without him. How will I ever survive this year alone?'_

§§§§

Harry himself was thinking much the same thing. _'Damn it Potter. You are so stupid! Why did you push one of the two people who, in your memory, ever really loved you away? What's next, Sirius?'_ It never occurred to Harry that Sirius wasn't about to let go of him, much less that Draco wasn't going to either. _'Yes, Sirius next. I'm only a danger to them both. It's because I love them that I have to do this.'_ Another part of his mind argued. But he couldn't fool himself. Draco was right. He was afraid. Afraid of being hurt again. But part of him knew Draco would never intentionally hurt him. He was really afraid of being completely and totally happy. He had heard that it was possible to be so, but he seriously doubted it. He himself anyway, could never be happy. He was pretty sure there was a stone somewhere that read 'The Boy Who Lived shall never be happy'. He wasn't going to bring the two most important people in his life down with him. With that, Harry ceased to think as he broke down in sobs. 

§§§§

Almost an hour later, Draco stood and resolutely wiped away the remaining tears. Now was not the time. He had to come up with a plan. He had seen the look in Harry's eyes. He hadn't really wanted to do that. So he would get his love back. He just had to come up with a plan. And he had to do it fast. He knew he had to get Harry back before September 1st, or it would be almost impossible to ever do it. He had to come up with a plan and fast. But he knew he would. He would because he had to. He knew that, as brave and strong everyone thought Harry to be, he was really just a little a boy inside, wanting desperately to be loved. And he was. Draco loved him. Sirius loved him; Draco could see it in his eyes. But Harry refused to acknowledge it. 

Draco also knew that Harry would become depressed soon. He had been there himself enough times to know. Then he would stop caring. He'd stop trying. And Draco knew that when that happened Harry would let his guard down, making it easy for the Death Eaters to make there move. Then Harry would be dead, and Draco really would be alone. 

Desperate to save his love, Draco ran to Dumbledore's office, knowing if anyone could help him save the boy he loved, it would be him. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued

****

**Author's Note: Okay, there it is. Sorry about the wait. I hope to have the next part out soon. Does anyone understand the tie between the title, quote, and story? It's like Harry is usually the optimist and Draco the pessimist, but in this chapter, their roles have switched. Anyways, as always, please review. It really helps me write faster. HINT HINT!!!**   



	13. Treasure

Treasure

**_Chapter XIII: Treasure_**   
_Treasure each other in the recognition that we do not know how_   
_ long we shall have each other.--Joshua Loth Liebman_

By noon Draco had decided what he was going to do. It wasn't some great, romantic plan. Simply put, he was going to show Harry that he wasn't going to give up on them so easily. He was going to find Harry and convince them that this relationship would make them strong, not weak. He hadn't talked with Dumbledore, deciding what to do in his own. 

He ran up the stairs to Gryfindorr tower, taking them two at a time. He was in a panic. Something was wrong. He could feel it in his bones. It seemed an eternity before he reached the portrait of the Fat Lady. He shouted the password and she swung open. A moment later he was finally in the Common Room. Harry was no where to be seen. He ran to the dorms, skidding to a stop at the sight that greeted him. Sirius was sitting there; Harry cradled in his lap. Harry wasn't moving. This frightened Draco more than anything possibly could have. 

"Sirius, what happened to Harry?" His voice shook with fear. 

Sirius' voice wasn't much different. "I don't know. We have to get him to the Hospital Wing." 

Together the two levitated him and floated him to the Hospital Wing. Once there, they called for Madam Pomfrey to look Harry over. As soon as she started her exam, Sirius went for Dumbledore. 

Draco watched Madame Pomfrey with a cautious eye. He was scared. This was plain to see. What if he was too late? What if Harry… he couldn't even finish the thought. What if he lost the boy he loved before he could even tell him? Before they could fix things between them. Was this how it was going to end? With a fight? Would the last words they ever spoke to each other be ones of anger? Draco was terrified that was how the relationship would end. 

By now Madam Pomfrey had finished and Sirius had returned, Dumbledore beside him. 

"So Poppy, what seems to be the matter with him?" 

"Nothing. Physically anyway. Whatever is wrong is in his own mind. He seems to be in a self-induced coma of sorts. And as he brought this on himself, the only way out is for him to decide to wake up." 

"What if he doesn't?" This was Draco, the fear once again evident in his voice. 

"If he doesn't decide to wake up then he will eventually wither away and die. His body will shut down and after enough organs do so, he will succumb to death." 

Sirius and Draco looked shocked. Dumbledore and Pomfrey looked saddened. They each mumbled what sounded like an apology before leaving the other two to their grief. 

To Sirius, it felt like he was losing a part of himself. It felt like he was losing a son. Over the past year, Harry had become a son to him, and, had he been given the chance, he would have adopted the boy immediately. It felt like he was losing James all over again. This pain also brought with it the memories of James and Lily, which still haunted him. He had failed them. He had sworn to them that he would love their son. He did. He swore he would protect him. He had failed. 

To Draco it also felt like he was losing a part of himself. The best part. He was losing his lover. He knew that he may only be fifteen, but he would never love someone as much as he did Harry. No one would ever make him feel this way again. He was losing his best friend. He had never had many friends, and Harry had been the first person to truly care about him. He was losing his soul mate. The one person put on Earth just for him. And it hurt. He could feel the pain ripping him apart inside. It felt like someone had ripped open his chest, yanked out his heart, stomped on it, shredded it, pissed on it, and stuck it back in his chest. This was a pain he had never felt before. 

It was hours later. Sirius had long ago fell asleep at Harry's bedside, clutching his hand in hopes it would convey how much he really loved his godson, even though he had never told him. 

Draco sat on Harry's other side. Both men had refused to leave Harry's bedside. Draco sat, clutching his other hand. It had been torture to hide his true emotions from Sirius all afternoon. Now he was finally free to let the tears he had been holding at bay free. The drops slid down his cheeks, falling onto their clasped hands. And for the first time since Draco was a small child, he prayed. He prayed to anyone that would listen to him. He prayed that Harry would come back, so Draco could make everything okay again. If Harry came back, it would all be okay. 

"Please Harry," Draco whispered, "please come back to me. I need you here, I really do. I don't think I can do this without you, so please don't make me try. I love you. Just please, please come back. Come back to me. Come back to Sirius. We both love you so much. I promise Harry, if you come back, you will be loved. I'll take care of your heart. I'll make sure it doesn't get bruised or torn. Just come back and give me your heart. I'll love you my whole life." 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued

**Author's Note:** Sorry that took so long. Please see 14 for news on the next installment. **Please, please, please review!!!**


	14. Interlude

Interlude

**_Chapter XIV: Interlude_**   
_ "The winter here's cold, and bitter_   
_It's chilled us to the bone_   
_We haven't seen the sun for weeks_   
_To long too far from home_   
_I feel just like I'm sinking_   
_And I claw for solid ground_   
_I'm pulled down by the undertow_   
_I never thought I could feel so low_   
_Oh darkness I feel like letting go"_   
_ ~Sarah McLachlan "Full of Grace"_

"Draco, we're going to have to talk about it sometime." 

"I know Harry… I'd just really… rather not. It's not something that is easy. I don't like to remember it, much less tell another person about it." 

The two boys were speaking of their pasts. Both knew that they would have to share them with the other and probably sometime soon. But neither boy was looking forward to it. They knew that for their relationship they had to be completely honest with each other, but the only thing either could see this accomplishing was bringing back all the hurt and all the pain that they had tried so hard to forget. 

_If all of the strength and all of the courage_   
_Come and lift me from this place_   
_I know I could love you much better than this_   
_Full of grace_   
_Full of grace_   
_My love_

"Do you want me to start?" Harry asked Draco that night. They were alone in the Common Room and had decided that they were going to do this. Draco nodded silently. 

Harry took a deep breath and started his story. "As long as I can remember I've lived with the Dursleys. They've always hated me; they've made that very obvious for as long as I can remember. When I was really little, it was just comments. Nasty little things said to me by both my aunt and uncle. That and I slept in the cupboard under the stairs. It was dark and damp and the only company I had was the spiders. They'd never take me anywhere, always leaving me with an elderly neighbor. As I got older the comments got worse. Very seldom did I know what the names they were calling me meant, but I've found out as I've gotten older. Eventually, my cousin started in on me as well. He's always been slow, so instead of saying anything he would just hit me. My aunt and uncle seemed to like this idea. Soon enough, they had resorted to physical violence as well. My uncle would often hit me with his fists in place that would always be covered by clothing. My aunt's favorite was hitting me in the head with pots and pans. I hoped that when I started school, I would have an escape, but no. Dudley went to the same school and made sure no one would even talk to me. At home, things continued to get worse. Over the years, I broke more bones and lost conciseness more times than I could count. Eventually they stopped caring if it left visible marks. I had few clothes so I had to wear the same things all the time. Everybody at school made fun of me. Eventually they started hitting me too. By the time I was nine, Dudley was almost ten, and was starting to wonder about sex. He had heard the bigger kids talking about it at school and he wanted to find out what it was like. Of course, being as fat as he is, no girl wanted to be near him. So he found the easiest test subject. He would come down to my room at night and do things… we never actually had sex or anything, but he made me touch him, and he would touch me, though not very often. He would come down, have me play with him until he was satisfied and then he would leave. Of course, he never told his parents, and neither did I. They would have been outraged by something so abnormal, and he wasn't going to target himself. One night though, Uncle Vernon woke in the middle of the night, needing to use the bathroom. He could hear Dudley's moans coming from downstairs and came down to investigate. As soon as Dudley saw him, which was before I did, he started telling me to get away from him and slapping at my hands, like I was violating him, not the other way around. Of course my uncle believed Dudley. That was the worse beating I ever got. I was unconciess for over a day, and they locked me in there for two more, without food. After that, the beatings continued, but they also started locking me under the stairs, for days at a time sometimes, almost always without food. Things continued like this until I stared Hogwarts. When I came back after my first year, they gave me Dudley's old room and the beatings stopped. Until the other day. That was the first time I had been hit by my relatives in four years. And it'll be the last. I refuse to go back there, ever." By the time he finished, Harry had tears running down his face. Draco, who had been sitting in a chair across from him, moved to his boyfriend's side and just held him for several moments. When harry calmed down, Draco returned to his seat, knowing that it was now his turn.   


_So it's better this way, I said_   
_Having seen this place before_   
_Where everything we said and do_   
_Hurts us all the more_   
_It's just that we stayed, too long_   
_In the same old sickly skin_   
_I'm pulled down by the undertow_   
_I never thought I could feel so low_   
_Oh darkness I feel like letting go_

"Like you, I was never shown affection of any kind. When I was old enough to work a wand, my father started to illegally teach me curses. All were Dark Magic of course. He often showed me their effects by casting them on me. When I was five he taught me Avada Kedavra. The first thing I successfully cast it upon was my pet kitten. After that, I tried so hard to become what my father expected, the obedient little heir, who would follow in his father's footsteps. But I couldn't be that evil and I knew it. When I failed to meet his expectations, which was often, he, like your relatives, would resort to physical abuse. He would take me down to the dungeons, tie me up, and… well, it was usually just whips and chains, but there were times with knives and spikes. Then for little things he would use whatever was around. This is something that continues even today. Last time I was home he slammed my hand in the door for having the second highest grade in a class. Granger, a Mudblood, had beaten me. This was unacceptable. Anyway, as I got older, the lessons became worse as did the punishments. At eight, he started coming in to my room at night. At first, for about a year, it was the same as with you. Inappropriate touching, but nothing else. But after that, he wanted me suck… well, you know. Every night he came in for this. I had to do it several times every night. So far, I am still a virgin, though he has expressed that we will eventually do that as well. My mother, meanwhile, knows, knew back then, that this was going on. She did nothing to stop it. Several times she has come in to watch. People might ask how I could betray my parents and help their enemies. That is how I justify it. I was nothing to them. An heir, someone to carry on the family line. Someone to be used as a sacrifice for Voldermort. They never loved me and I never loved them. That is how I justify what I do." Both Harry and Draco were crying, real tears, in torrents. For Harry, his aunt, uncle and cousin had abused him. For Draco, it had been his parents. The two people who are supposed to love you above all else, no matter what. And maybe, knowing that some parents, like Harry's, really did love their children so much, was what hurt he most. Knowing that they would sacrifice you too the most evil wizard ever in a second, while other parents died to save their children from that same wizard. That was the hardest part. 

Harry held Draco while he wept, whispering what he hoped were soothing comments in his ear. He felt kind of useless. He just wished he could take all his boyfriend's pain away. After a while of silence except for the sound of Draco sobbing, Harry spoke. 

"Draco, about all…" Draco cut him off. 

"No, Harry. We told each other, but please, let's not discuss it. Nothing back then matters anymore I have you now, and that almost makes up for it all." 

"But it doesn't. I can't take all that away, I'm not enough." 

"Nothing is enough to take it all away. But you take more away then anyone else ever could. Please Harry. It's in the past; there is nothing either of us can do about it now, as much as we may want to. It won't work. So please, can we just stop there and leave it at that?" He was pleading, the look in his eyes was one of pure desperation and Harry couldn't stand to see him suffer anymore. 

"Alright, we'll leave it at that." 

_If all of the strength_   
_And all of the courage_   
_Come and lift me from this place_   
_I know I could love you much better than this_   
_Full of grace_   
_Full of grace_   
_My love_****

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued **Author's Note: **Okay, that part was dedicated to** Nykto** who seemed to really want this conversation. This, obviously, is just an interlude, which took place soon after Harry arrived at Hogwarts for the summer, or sometime before Ch 10 at least. Anyways, I have started the next part (15) and hope to have it out within a few days. As always, please review. It'll help me get the next chapter written faster. Without many reviews, I just take my time, taking a week, ten days... however long it takes. But reviews encourage and they make me feel good. When I feel good I get ideas. When I get ideas I write. When I write, you get new chapters. See, it really does benifit you to review!!! So, until next time,   
**PEACE OUT**   



	15. Carpe Diem

Carpe Diem

**Chapter XV: Carpe Diem**   
_"Carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero."_   
Latin: Seize the day, put no trust in tomorrow

Much to Draco's surprise, the sun did rise the next morning, just as it always had. Maybe Harry's possible impending death wasn't the end of the world after all. It was just the end of his world. 

He had cried himself to sleep at Harry's bedside sometime late in the night, still clutching Harry's hand in his own. He could feel the dried tears on his pale cheeks and this is what told him he had fell asleep crying. Curiously, he glanced over at Sirius to see if the older man had woken up yet. He hadn't and Draco wasn't going to be the one to wake him, not when Harry was still… asleep. _Yeah, that's it, he's just asleep._ Draco thought to himself with a snort. If only sleep was all it was. 

Draco just sat there for hours. He had thought about going to breakfast, alone, down in the Great Hall, but quickly dismissed that idea. He found himself feeling nauseous at the thought of food. Besides, he really didn't think he could pull himself away from Harry for that long. Not when it was questionable if Harry would ever wake up. 

The one person Draco saw that morning besides Harry was Sirius, who remained asleep. Occasionally he would stir or mumble, obviously lost in the dream world. Draco imagined he was dreaming of Azkaban and the horrors that had been inflicted upon him while he was there. 

And so, of course, Draco was surprised when the door opened around noon to reveal Hermoine behind it. 

"What are you doing here?" was the first thing out of his mouth when he finally regained the power of speech. 

"Dumbledore notified me of Harry's condition last night, and asked that I come. He thought that Harry needed a friend, besides you, and thought I would handle all this better than Ron. I suppose he's right, though I must admit I'm surprised." 

"Surprised?" 

"About you and Harry's situation. It's hard to comprehend you are no longer the bad guy." 

"Our situation? What are you talking about?" 

"Don't pretend I'm stupid Malfoy, I know you and Harry have become friends, whether you admit as much to me or not. Don't worry, I won't spread it around. I'm just glad Harry had some one there for him after what his uncle did." 

"Obviously I wasn't enough. He's still like this," Draco fought to hold back sobs, trying to hide them from Hermoine. 

"Draco, it's alright to cry. This really is affecting you, you really do care about him, don't you?" 

"Yes, I do. More then you could ever understand. He's the first real friend I've ever had, and I don't think I can lose that. Not now, not when I've come to need it so badly." 

"Draco, if, if you wanted, I could be your friend. So could Ron, whenever you two get around to telling him. He'll understand Draco, just like I do." 

"Harry will still always be my best friend. I can't lose him Hermoine, I don't think I can do that. It hurts so much, is it supposed to hurt this much?" Draco was shocked to find himself crying. Hermoine shocked him even more when she took him in her arms, trying to soothe the weeping boy. 

"It's alright. The reason you hurt is because you love him." Draco panicked at this, but her next words calmed him. "He's the first friend you've had, so of course, the pain of losing him would be even worse. Besides, you won't lose him. We won't lose him. Harry is the strongest person I know he won't go without a fight. Especially when he has people who are back here depending on him." 

The two were silent for awhile after that until Hermoine broke the silence. 

"Draco?" 

"Hmm?" 

"Have you ever heard the term 'Carpe Diem'?" 

"Yes." 

"Do you know what it means?" 

"Yes. It means 'Seize the day.'"   
  
"Well, maybe you should do that." 

"What do you mean?" 

"Seize the day. Tell Harry how you're feeling. I know he can hear you. Get it all off your chest, it'll make you feel the better." 

Draco could see the sense in her words and nodded in agreement. "Alright. I'll try it." 

"I'll leave you two alone." Hermoine made her way to the door. 

Just as she was about to walk out the door, Draco called to her. She turned back to face him, an expectant look on her face. 

"Thank you." This was all he said to her, but it was enough. Somehow those two words were able to express the depth of gratitude he was feeling in a way he never would have been capable of. Giving him a smile she nodded, before turning and leaving, closing the door behind her. 

Turning back to the boy he loved, Draco took a deep breath and seized the moment. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued

**Author's Note:** Okay, there's Ch 15. Hope everyone liked it. Hope you also noticed I put up the real 14, which I actually did, like, last week. Sorry this one took so long. I had to fight with myself not to just let Harry die. Some part of me wants to write the death and aftermath scenes so badly. But I do like writing this series, so I just couldn't bring myself to do that. But then again, if I don't get what I consider is enough reviews, I might just do that anyway. So consider yourself warned. Anyway, till next time,   
_See ya._   



	16. The Truth

**Chapter XVI: The Truth**   
_"Truth will always be truth, regardless of lack of understanding,_   
_ disbelief or ignorance."--W. Clement Stone_

It wasn't until the late afternoon that Sirius awoke. When he did it was with a small jump and a gasp, startling both himself and Draco, who had moved back to his chair, now done with spilling his heart to the boy he loved. 

"Draco, you startled me." Sirius gasped. 

"I startled you, you were the one who just woke himself up. I didn't say or do anything, you woke on your own." 

"Must have been a nightmare then, I do seem to have those quite often." 

"I'd imagine you would. After where you spent 12 years of your life, well, I'd have nightmares too." 

"Well, I do hope you'd be smarter than me and not get yourself thrown into Azkaban." 

"It wasn't your fault. Harry told me what happened, you were just trying to protect your friends." 

"You and Harry talked about alot of things huh? You two were really close." 

"Yeah, we were good friends." 

"Don't lie to me." 

"What?" Draco tried to keep the panic out of his voice. 

"Don't lie to me. I know you two were more than friends. You don't think I didn't recognize the signs?" 

"The signs? Even if that were true, how would you know 'the signs'?" 

"I was there myself boy. I'm not so old that I don't remember when I first fell in love. Not as strong a love as you two have, but I still love him today, and we're sort of together if that means anything. It's hard mainting a stable relationship while on the run, you know?" 

"Him? You, you're...gay?" 

"Oh yes, I guess I never did tell Harry. I was afraid that, well that he would push me away." 

"He thought that you would shun him if he told you about us." 

"It hurts that he would think that, but I suppose I never gave any indication to my opinion on the matter." 

"He'll be glad to know that when...if...when he wakes up. How long have you known about the two of us?" 

"Since the day you two got together." 

"And you never said anything?" 

"I figured Harry would tell me when he was ready to and I wouldn't push him to it. How close are the two of you, by the way?" 

"Well, we never reached intercourse or anything, but we are, well we were, no, we are in love. Even if he did break up with me." 

"Why did he break up with you if he loves you?" 

"He was trying to protect me. He was worried that he would just be a danger to me. I'm not going to let him get away that easily." 

"Be sure that you don't. He does love you, and a love like that which the two of you have doesn't occur very often. Hold onto it." 

"I'm sure as hell going to try." 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued 

**Author's Note:** Well after a very long hiatus, I am back! Sorry to keep you waiting, I hope people are still interested in the story. I **will** have the next chapter soon, and I promise not to take 5 months this time!   
See ya next time 


	17. It Doesn't Even Matter

**Chapter XVII: It Doesn't Even Matter**   
_"I tried so hard_   
_ And got so far_   
_ But in the end_   
_ It doesn't even matter_   
_ I had to fall_   
_ And lose it all_   
_ But in the end_   
_ It doesn't even matter"_   
_--In the End, Linkin Park_

School started soon. Draco knew this of course, he just hadn't really thought of the effects of this fact. If Harry hadn't woken up by then, he didn't know how he would make through the days. He would be figured out for sure, and he knew he couldn't afford that. At least if he woke up, he would know that he would be alright, and he would see him everyday. 

He hadn't moved from Harry's bedside the whole time he had been there. Madam Pomfrey would bring him and Sirius meals, but he would seldom eat them. He just didn't find himself hungry. Some days he forced himself to eat, just so he wouldn't become sick as well, but he never actually felt any feelings of hunger. He knew he was shutting down as well, but was unable to stop it. He knew his only hope was for Harry to wake up. 

It was the third day of Harry's coma. It had felt like an eternity to Draco. Sirius was still asleep on the other side of the bed, but Draco was awake and found himself just watching the boy he loved. Without even being aware of it, he started to speak. 

"I've tried to imagine what my life will be like if you don't wake up. I can't do it Harry. I can't picture a life without you in it. If you die Harry, so do I. That's all there is to it. You said you love me, and I believe you, as I love you too. If you really love me, please don't do this to me. This is killing me Harry, as surely as it's killing you, and I don't want either of us to die, not when we have finally found so much worth living for. Look Harry, I know you're scared. It's okay, I understand. Hell, I'm scared too. This position we're in, it's a scary thing. But what's even scarier to me is the fact, that, well that you've given up. I thought that we had something that was worth living for. Obviously, not for you. First you tried to end it, but I won't let you do that. We can make this work and we will, because I will not go back to being alone, not after I know what it feels like for someone to truly love me for the first time in my life. We got so far Harry, our relationship was really starting be something. I could see that it was going to last. But I guess it doesn't even matter. Not in the end. With this, this coma, you possibly dying, I've realized how much you mean to me. I've lost it all Harry. I don't have anything in this world but you. But I guess you don't care. Maybe I never meant that much to you to begin with. Cause if I did, you wouldn't be doing this to me. If you really loved me, there is no way you could make me suffer like this." Draco was crying by now, his voice muffled, his face buried in his arms which were on the bed. 

Draco was to busy weeping to see. He didn't see the twitch of Harry's eyelids. He didn't see them open. He didn't see Harry's hand raise off the bed. He lifted his head at the light stroke of his hair. He gasped. 

"I do love you, Draco. I love you so much." 

The noise Draco made surprised them both. With a strangled cry, he buried his face in Harry's neck, neither boy noticing that Sirius had awoken at Draco's outburst and was now watching the two of them with a wistful look on his face. Instead the two of them slowly rocked back and forth, knowing they had much to talk about, but at least they were together. 

_'Oh Remus,'_ Sirius thought, to himself, _'how I miss the days when we were this young. How I miss being able to hold you in my arms and be held by you as well. When will we have that back again? We both want it, I know we do, you said as much when I was there. Why must this all be so hard? Oh, Remus, I miss you, love.'_

From the door of the room, Albus Dumbledore watched. Harry was awake. He knew Sirius and Draco would be alright now. There was still much to be sorted out between the three, but that would all come in due time. 

**T**o **B**e **C**ontinued 

**Author's Note:** Well, there is Chapter 17, 18 should be out soon, or at least I hope it will be. Reviews are always a nice incentive to get the next part out though, if anybody was interested. 


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